I wanna see you movin'... Love your body language... Let me be your paperman... Love to be in your command///

Ugh. Seriously, 'Breaking Dawn' is was the stupidest book I have ever read. But I am glad that I am finally done with it... I am also happy that I didn't waste my money on that crap book. And now I can spend some time reading 'Pride and Prejudice and Zombies'!

Oh. Baseball game on Sunday with Paul... Giants v. Mariners! I finally get to see Casey after he was traded from Anaheim to Atlanta then Boston... <3<3<3

I'm cracking eggs of wisdom!///

I tell you, I simply can not wait for the weekend. I have so many things to do and I feel like I will not have enough time to accomplish them. I have a paper due next week that I totally forgot about. The problem is, I need this class in order to transfer to Sac State. I wish I hadn't goofed off this long in school. I could have been there years ago! Other then that, life is pretty good. My right wrist has been hurting me today. I had the Doctor take an x-ray of it and it looks alright... He rubbed it this morning and it hurt so bad. I am now going to need an arm brace because I apparently have wrist tendonitis. Joy!

I hate it when:

• people who have only been to a place once talk about that place like they are an expert in it. For example, people who have only been to a foreign country one time and when they talk to other people about it, the come off like an expert in everything about that place. Drives me nuts.
• deadlines come up faster then expected. I have to read a book and write a 6 page paper on it by Tuesday. I think I can do it. I just need to be optimistic about it and work hard. Wish me luck on that.

I never statutory raped anyone before///

And like that, my weekend is over. Sometimes, I wish I could be out of work forever. I don't know how fulfilled my life would be but it sounds nice every now and then. The one good thing about this week is the good Doctor is going to be out of the office for most of Friday. We are spending the day packing for the big move come November. I don't know how that is going to happen. There are lots of things that I honestly don't want to think about.

I did the tour @ Sac State on Saturday. The bus ride there was quite enjoyable. 30 minutes and the whole thing was free! I think that I might end up there after all. I looked at the info of UC Davis and I have apparently missed the deadline for applying to UC Davis. There is a Preview Day @ Davis coming up in 2 weeks. I signed up for that one. I talked to Paul about school and we came up to some ideas. I only need 10 more units to transfer to Sac State for Fall 2010. I need those units by the end of Spring 2010. My ultimate goal would be to get my BA @ Sac State and then go to UC Davis to get my Masters in Art History. A pipe dream? Maybe. But I think it can happen.


I hate it when:

• I have to watch someone bomb a public speaking gig. At the Preview Day @ Sac State, they had speakers talk about different important topics like admissions, financial aide and housing on campus. The one guy who did the on campus housing bombed big time. He seemed like he was totally unprepared. He was stuttering, stammering and pausing for long periods of time thought the presentation. I felt so embarrassed for the guy that I wish I could have hugged him or something. I left the question and answer part early. I just couldn't handle it any more. After the whole thing, I kept hearing people talk about how painful the whole thing was. I am glad I was not the only one.
• people wear Coach shoes. I think they are the ugliest shoes in the world. Like I need to know that you have money for those shitty ass things! One of the ladies who was doing the campus tour had those shoes. I am glad that this person choose to keep it real at school.
• I have to watch Norte Dame football fans. I think that the players are douche bags, the fans are douche bags and they are just so fucking overrated. They are almost as bad as Raiders fans. And Raiders fans are pretty bad... I know that for a fact.
  

Time for bed. Tomorrow is payday. Life will be good again.

That gypsy son of a bitch burned us///

I am soooo happy that it is finally Friday. The week is finally coming to an end. I suppose it will be ending in a few more hours but who is counting? I am excited for Monday (I normally wouldn't but Monday is payday and I am so beyond broke, its not even funny). Tomorrow, I wake early for a day of excitement. I am heading out to Sac State for Preview Day. If all goes well, I will be entering the college for Fall 2010 semester. I am real excited about the future now. I know deep down that Grandma would be proud of me that I am following my dreams and will be (someday) making them a reality. Since I am broke, I will be riding the bus (I haven't taken public transportation too much here in Sacramento besides the Light Rail) and its perfect because there is a bus stop up the street from where I live and it takes me right to Sac State!!!

Tomorrow, Paul has a big test. Its the CBEST. He wants to become a teacher someday and has to take this test as the first step towards that goal. I am so proud of him. I hope he does well on the test. I know how much this whole thing means to him.

And now, since I mentioned all the good things going on, here is more to add to my list of things that I hate...

I hate when:

• people talk loud in an office waiting room. Here at my work, there are a few patients who are like that. I am not sure if they really don't know how loud they really are (I am that way according to Paul) or if these people are just obnoxious and think they are THAT important. I had a doctors appointment yesterday morning and there were a few people who were doing this. Drove me nuts. I almost wish that I had brought my mp3 player to listen to... since I ended up waiting about an hour to see my stupid doctor! Which brings me to...
• I had to wait for my doctor for almost an hour! I know it would have been longer if I didn't walk up to the stupid receptionist and complain about the wait. I had a 1030am appointment and didn't get in till about 1130ish. I had even shown up a little early (like by 10 minutes). I almost walked out and just said "fuck it" but I was already there. Then, they keep me there at the office for almost 2 hours doing test and crap on me... I didn't even get to do my pap smear/ gyno check up that I was supposed to be scheduled for. Part of me wants to find a new doctor but I have been with this practice since I was a teenager. Good news to this story: I do feel justified now... I stole a fake hand from the room I was doing my check up in. Its pretty cool too. Its clear and there is a skeleton inside (fake, mind you) and I put my "prize" on the mantle in the house as an inside joke.

I am feeling optimistic about life. I know things will get better. It has to be, right? Oh, when I get paid, I am SO pre-ordering the new Ratchet & Clank game. This fact will be the one thing that will get me thru most of the month! Only 25 more days to go!

Hate is a strong word... But I really, really, really don't like you///

Song of the Day:: Plain White T's> Hate (I Really Don't Like You)


Ah. Another day. The only good thing about today besides having the morning free to do filing and busy paper work here at the office. Yes, it is a Tuesday. The weather is finally looking like fall time and not like summer anymore. Tonight is also American History class. I will admit, I don't think I am doing well. The nightly reading kills me. Each chapter that we have to read as homework is about 30 pages long. Don't get me started on the daily quizzes either (I never remember the important things that end up being on the stupid quizzes). If I manage to pull a 'C' out of this class, life will be good. I only have 3 more weeks in this class. I think I can do it. One more test and one more paper.

And now, the things I hate.

I hate when:

• People don't tell me important things that I need to know... Then they get all snippy when I try to call them out on it. I try my hardest to write notes down as the information comes, send emails about important events or issues (I think I send Paul a few messages a day just to touch base with him) but I feel like the common courtesy isn't being bestowed to me. This, in turn, drives me nuts.
• People who make driving seem like a game. Now, I am one to talk. I have done this a few times especially while driving home from San Francisco. You know, the 'California Road Block'? I just hate it when the same car tries to pass me up on the freeway over and over again... Last night, it was a fucking Prius. God-Damn hippie vehicle!

Any who. This is all for now. I have a feeling like more will be coming up. I never seem to have a good day anymore.

If you have hate in your heart, let it out...

For some reason, things have been bothering me more and more as the days go by... I have even caught myself jotting down little notes as these things happen in my day. I figured I would share them... Mostly for my own memory and to track how truly full of hate is inside of me... Here we go...

I hate when:

• people try to remember things about me and when they ask me, its completely wrong info. Example: People asking me "You're birthday is coming up, right?" Um, no. It's 3 months away but thanks for making an ass of yourself.
• people ask how my weekend is when I know they could give a shit. Please don't ask me this stupid question just to make idle chit-chat. If I did do something that I want you to know about, trust me, I would tell someone. (I went to the Zoo on Saturday and baked cupcakes while watching football on Sunday, happy?!)

So far, this is all. Trust me, I will be putting up more things when I can. If you only knew the people I come into contact with on a daily basis, you would go crazy too.

PS: Happy Yom Kippur! I am attempting to fast today. Paul said that I didn't have to but I am showing my support. Wish me luck!

... And why couldn't you tell me this to my face...

Things I hate:

Is it possible to get or be mad at someone for doing something that another person didn't tell them to do? If I was told to do something, I would have done it. If it wasn't done, then I was probably not told. *sigh*


Only one more year at community college... One more year. Next year, things are going to be different.

Dead like disco...

Things I hate:

People dying.

Yeah, I know that for the most case, people can't control when and how they die (like my Grandma for example). Unexpected deaths are not my favorite... Jetta (my dog) died suddenly earlier this month and now 3 celebrities and one person I knew died... Ed McMahon, Farrah Faucet and Michael Jackson... And a patient here at my work.

In honor of Michael, I am listening to 3 of his albums here in the office. 'Thriller' is my all time favorite tho.

Today sucks.


Oh yeah, I have a math test today too... I don't think I will do well.

You ask for understanding beauty, well that's more than I could ever give you now///

Song of the Day: Mellowdrone> Amazing



Maybe its the fact that I am tired... and slightly cranky... or maybe, I have just had it to here (holds her hand up to her forehead), but I got to thinking just now...



Can tell me who 'DOC DOC LLC' is?

I have noticed that they read my blog a lot.

My blog logs each person/ IP address that stumbles across this page... People from Finland to Mexico, Poland to Lithuania, and all over the country have read my rants and adventures. I know when I stumble on it and when my friend old acquaintance in San Francisco read it too...

I have a feeling i know who it is tho.

Correction, I know who it is.

I wonder what they think they can find by looking me up so many times... Today (6/19/09) @ 5:46pm, earlier that same day @ 4:48pm; Monday (6/15/09) @ 4:16pm and so on...

Despite the fact that one would believe I keep all my personal thoughts and secrets on my blog (which, long ago, I once did. I wrote about everything on my mind from the time I was 15 as a junior in high school till my mid 20's), I don't... So, if you feel so inclined to keep on snooping around, why don't you just man up and ask. I may come off as slow or dimwitted, but I am so much smarter and cunning then I portray. You have no idea the things I know, so stop being a brown-noser and get a life, leave this pissed off 25 year old woman alone!

Oh well, I love IP addresses... Its a dead give away to their location/ identity.

Thank you.


-Amanda

PS: By the way, congrats on trying to be sneaky. Try harder next time, kthxbye.

But my heart will still jump because to me, they look the same///

Song of the Day:: Ima Robot> Black Jettas
*When I lived with my parents, I would play this song and dance around Jetta in my bedroom.




Dad sent me a text message after I had gotten out of the shower @ 715am. He usually doesn't send many texts (unless he wants something).

Dad - Bring my shovel. I need to bury Jetta.
Manda - She died?
Dad - No Amanda, I just want to bury her... Of course she died.
Manda - When did this happen?
Dad - Last night.
Manda - I'll bring it after work. Is that okay?
Dad - Sure. She is not going anywhere.

Funny, when my Grandma died in April I found out on a Friday too. What a way to start off a weekend. Burring the dog I got when I was 13. *sigh* She lived a long life. She even out lived some of the cats that she helped raise when their mom died.




This is the only photo of here that I can find at the moment. She got real sick during Christmas time and I thought we were going to loose her then. Mom had to feed her with a eyedropper. Not long after that, she lost her vision. She had a hard time dealing with being blind. She would run into the walls, furniture and would trip in the doorway getting in and out of the house. Mom called her a "roomba" because when she was outside, she would walk in circles. She, like my Grandma, never lost her spunk. She lost quite a bit of weight in her last few months but she was always excited to see hear that Paul and I were over visiting my parents. I miss her so much. She was the best thing about growing up at my parents house. She will always be my special girl... My parents use to call us sisters (we both had long black messy hair)... I wish the people I love most in the world would stop dying.

She is sleeping with the angels now... Having a blast with my Grandma and Grandpa. She lived a great 13 years... The best 13 years ever.


RIP Jetta Ramirez
10/31/96 - 6/4/09

WTF!

< / start rant >


So apparently KWOD 106.5 (the local "alternative" radio station in Sacramento) decided to cease being. Which is fine since I only listen to my mp3 player when in the car and use Pandora.com while on the interwebs. BUT, I had over 660,000 points in their "listener loyalty program" online with the hopes of wining tickets to concerts this summer (like I usually do). WTF!!!! Seriously! I want to punch someone or something! PS: I am tired and half asleep!


< / end rant >

& to know me as hardly golden is to know me all wrong... They were///

Song of the Day: Band of Horses> The Funeral


I hate writing papers. Especially on poetry and novels. This is all.

Team India.

Things that I hate:

Stupid dancing shows.

I think I am and have growing up a bit and have not been watching so many stupid reality shows. I will admit that I do like my usual VH-1 shows (Rock of Love has a soft spot in my heart still) and The Soup on E!, but I decided to watch the new dance show on NBC (something about the worlds best dancers with the host being that Lord of the Dance guy... Which, on a side note, I saw him in Las Vegas back in 2003 with Patrick and it was pretty bad ass.) which happened to be on TV after the SNL Sports Extra. Now, I usually like dance shows, not so much the Dancing With the Stars show (only because I am not a big fan of those the show picked to be on as a contestant and the ones that I do like end up being kicked off the show in the first few episodes) but I like to see what people can do and what they can push their bodies limits to do. So there are about 8 country teams that are competing in 2 types of dance competitions. One is a group dance and the other is a solo dance. I only want team India to win only because of my love for Bollywood dancing.


More about the latest info on "Move Out '09"


Bears.... Beats.... Battlestar Galatica.

I wonder why I'm so caught off guard when we kiss... I'd rather live my life in regret then do this///

Song of the day: Jimmy Eat World> Disintegration


I have thought long a hard what to write about my latest movie experience yesterday afternoon. I am lucky to have seen a lot of really good movies this year (Be Kind Rewind, Burn After Reading, Cloverfield, Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay, Iron Man, Kung Fu Panda, Tropic Thunder, Pineapple Express, The Dark Knight, Role Models). It helps that I have a great boyfriend who has good taste in music and movies. There have been some movies that I weren't too sure about which I ended up loving so much (like Burn After Reading), but still, the movies haven't been any lower then I expected. That was until yesterday.

I admit that I saw Twilight yesterday. The only reason why I got into the book was because of my co-worker, Sara. I love her to death. When she started to read the Twilight books (technically, I have only read book 1 and I am currently on New Moon, book 2), she told me how good they were and that I should give them a read sometime. Being that I was going to school with 2 hard classes at the time, I didn't have too much time to add another reading material to my ever growing list of books. I put it on the back burner of my world till about a month ago. I ended up dropping a real hard math class and had some time free to finally get to that book. I started it earlier this month and I managed to finish the book the day before the movie came out. Paul had promised me that he would see the movie with me if I had finished the book before the movie movie came out. I did win the bet, but I came to the conclusion that he wouldn't like to be stuck in a teenage movie for about 2 hours. I decided to go at it alone and have a day out to myself at the matinée showing. I figured that if I didn't like the movie, it would be better to spend $7 as apposed to $10 and having Paul not be into the movie as well.

My goodness. I wanted to like the movie so much and so badly. I couldn't do it. I figured that it wouldn't be as I imagined it because of its PG-13 rating... But it was just so bad on so many levels.

Things I hated/ were appalled by:

• The cutting of important scenes and parts from the book. There was one part in which Edward tells Bella why he has been avoiding her, which happened over the course of few weeks and in the movie, it was like 2 days. The other scene I was upset about was at the end in which Edward takes Bella to the prom. In the book, Alice helps Bella get ready by doing her hair, letting her borrow her dress and heels... Oh yeah, that part was missing including her heel (she had a walking cast on her other foot) which was replaced by a freaking Converse Chuck Taylor.

• Carlisle's history was completely left out!!!

• The families history was left out too! Seriously.

• The "animal" attacks never happened in the book (I think I would remember such an event as people being killed randomly) & totally threw me off track.

• The acting was horrid. Oh my goodness, I know that the characters are young adults, but they could have put more feeling into their performance. Bella was so dry and dull, nothing like the book portrays her. Edward was too full of himself, which I understand is partly done to keep Bella away from him. The dad (Charlie Swan) was entertaining. He was a dull character too but he played a Dad who hasn't been in his child's life and the performance seemed to fit that ideal.

• The soundtrack sucked. Of all the songs in the whole world, the list they presented the world was pathetic. I could come up with something better then what came out. I am so influenced by music, and there are others that could have been added that would have made a better impact then what actually was.

• They spliced scenes and put them in different orders. In the book, Edward meets Bella's dad before he takes her to meet his family... In the movie, Edward takes her to meet the family first and then he meets Charlie.

• The "special effects" were bad. Like painfully bad. The part with Edward running was funny for the wrong reasons. & the 'Meadow Scene' was a joke when Edward was 'glistening & sparkling'.

• The following scenes lacked important info :La Push, The Cullen House, The Prom, The Hotel, The Airport, The Meadow, The Hospital.

• One of the most important lines in the book was missing completely: When Alice says the following to Bella when James is coming after her:

It’s been almost a century that Edward’s been alone. Now he’s found you. You can’t see the changes that we see, we who have been with him for so long. Do you think any of us want to look into his eyes for the next hundred years if he loses you?"

Anyways, Other then that, I gave it a 2 of 5 "stars". It could have been so much better


In other news, I got my eyebrows waxed again @ Macy's, new nail polish @ Hot Topic (which I went in to see Nancy & bitch to her about the movie too) and new mascara (red) @ Ulta. I need to work on the speech for tomorrow. I know I will suck when I present it.

...things i hate...

Things I hate:

-Lindsay Lohan movies. I think I have seen about 3 of her movies in the last week on tv (Mean Girls, Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen & Freaky Friday) and I have never been so embarrassed in my life... Not because I am wasting my time when I could be doing other things (like working on my Speech paper or finishing that Twilight book that I am now about half way done with) but because she is a horrible actress. I feel bad for her. It just makes me so sad.

-The Girls Next Door... So many things are wrong with that show. From the controlling bitch named Holly, to the stupid retard Kendra and the ditzy blond Bridget. Banging an old bag of skeletons must be a hard job. This show is what makes this country so bad.

If you don't like my lyrics you can press fast forward///

Song of the day: Jay-Z> 99 Problems

I have a lot of things on my mind... I am seriously debating on whether or not to write them in here. I know that this is my on blog, this is a place where I can freely write my thoughts and to know that they are my opinions at this moment. But I cant help to wonder if what I am thinking/ writing/ saying will be used against me. Deep down, I know that my words will be used against me... Its only a matter of when and where.

Never mind... I'll keep it to myself... Next topic?



I cant wait for the elections to be over. I am tired of the following words too:

1. Maverick
2. Change
3. Reform
4. Hockey Mom
5. Ronald Reagan
   

There is blood on all the shoes you've worn from the people you've been stepping on///

Song of the day: Death From Above 1979> Blood on Our Hands


A list of random things:

Today I just found out that Paul Newman died. It really made me sad to read that on my gossip sites. I have his Newman's Own salsa in the fridge... I think I will eat the rest of it in his honor. His food is real good. I'll always have a spot for him in my heart.

Last night I was thinking about death right before I went to sleep. I don't know what prompted this thought but I kept wondering what it will be like and what will become of me and my legacy. Maybe I am worried that I am not going to do enough in/with my life. Ugh.

I just heard Interpol's "Slow Hands" used in an Armani commercial with that douche bag Josh Hartnett. I think I died a little bit inside just now.

And we'll pretend that it meant something so much more///

Song of the day: Death Cab for Cutie> Tiny Vessels


Tomorrow is 9/11...

Joy. (Manda = sarcastic)

Ugh. Stupid t-mobile... I cant do my 365 till their server comes back online. In the mean time, I'm watching Be Kind Rewind with Paul and finishing my plastic bag.

drama today.


i don't want to talk about it.